The Annual Wolfville Splurge

Spring is in the air. Lead by the CAO, on a diamond studded leash with a silver choker chain, our Mayor has come out of his burrow --- he didn't see his shadow --- so he's going to play. Read all about it in the Chronically Herald! (Friday 10 April edition.) We are rebuilding Front Street, again. (I guess last years effort was a stuff up?) The Good Lord His Munificence The Mayor said: there shall be a pedestrian boulevard, a new streetscape, and wireless downtown... Also, there will be new signs, Hallelujah! Heck, I'm buggered if I could ever figure out what the old signs were all about, and now they are going to erect new ones? What's a blue/green/brown permit zone? Who cares?

So does anyone know what this boulevard/streetscape is going to look like? Perhaps I'd know if I attended Council meetings. But then, I've heard stories about citizens going stark raving out of their minds after a couple of rounds in the Council Chambers...

Prudently, I took the safe option --- a visit to the Town of Waffleville website. So, when I got there I put in my thumb and pulled out.... well, nothing. No plans from which the interested citizen might glean a mere glimmer of an idea of what His Magnificence Our Most Gracious Benefactor The Mayor (His Munificence, for short) was showboating about in the spiel dutifully transcribed by the all-knowing CH. Still, we should all have faith. It is said that His Munificence is going to plant a grove of money trees in the "pedestrian boulevard".


Downtown is going wireless. Sounds sexy, doesn't it. A bit like topless --- or as near as you're ever going to come to anything saucey in Wolfville. Holier than thou silliness and foolishness dressed up as sexy are the very essence of His Munificence. And social justice for all, except the municipal taxpayer.

I have no idea why tens (hundreds?) of thousands of dollars will be spent on a wireless network. Internet connectivity is important, of course. Yes, I use an internet connection --- which I pay for. (Not wireless, for security reasons.) So why should I be paying for freebies for the Downtown Acolytes of His Munificence? Even if His Magificence were to buy a wireless service for me, I wouldn't accept it. I've got more dignity than that! I'd never be a servile flunky!

Beauty and the Pot Hole

"Downtown Wolfville to Get a Face Lift", says the Comical Herald. Meanwhile, over on Wickwire Street, a bus fell into a pot hole and a senior drove his electric cart into the ditch trying to get around the traffic-tangle. Fair go, forget about beauty, there are real problems in Wolfville --- of which Wickwire is just an illustrative example.

Lower Wickwire is an important route for public transport --- what with multiple medical services, an assisted-living home, a child-care centre, and high-density rental accommodation. Upper Wickwire is a major throughfare for pedestrians travelling to these facilities as well as to the University and Downtown. That's assuming these bipedal souls survive the passage --- because there are no sidewalks on Wickwire, upper or lower. I have seen fear in the eyes of old folks, as I drove by in my motor. Like them, I have have also contemplated the relative safety of a dive-into-the-ditch when perambulating Wickwire. Across one block, Chestnut, a street to nowhere, is resplendent with gold-paved sidewalk --- I wonder who lives there?

Fiscal Responsibility

His Magnificence Our Most Gracious Benefactor The Mayor (forever?), is also known as Spend-a-Buck Bob. Taxpayer bucks, that is...

The other day, my 10 year old posited:
"You know, you don't really spend --- what you do is trade."
Yes, I agreed, I trade my services for money which I then exchange for flour at the grocery store. Of course, that's only true for decent people. Thieves, of various sorts, play different games.

Politician's and their public-"service" puppet-masters play a game that goes like:
"I'll take your hard-earned money and use it to buy the votes of all the no-hopers who believe government fairy tales".
Thanks to the recession, this game has fallen a little flat. But that won't stop these political sponges. Like drug-crazed addicts, looting for another fix, our politicians have simply taken things to the next level. Now they borrow money on our behalf to spend it on their nonsense. If you are a business looking for a loan --- good luck, the governments have borrowed every available cent and are frantically printing money now that the credit-well is dry.

Hey stupid, the problem is debt! Someone will pay, and it won't be the politicians or the snivelling public "servants". If you have been fiscally responsible, you can be sure that these political piranas will, sooner or later, steal everything you have. Whether it be through outrageous taxation, hyper-inflation, or some newly concocted political torture --- you will pay for their stupidity, their self-serving excesses, and the no-hopers that they coddle on the taxpayers' teats.

The Municipal Re-Education Program

A majority of Wolfvillians voted against the sort of unsustainable fiscal irresponsibility that is the hallmark of His Munificence and his slavering pack of pick-pocket lacky's. Unfortunately, the fiscally responsible vote was split between three worthy mayoral candidates --- so that great practitioner of mealy-mouthed campaining and public obfusification, His Munificence, sneaked in by the back alley. Fortunately, three new members were elected to Council, on a ticket to keep Municipal Taxation within reason.

Now three isn't exactly a responsible majority in the context of Wolfville Council. Nevertheless, these guys must be doing something right because the Chief Administrative Officer opined:
"The Wolfville budget for 2009 will likely not be firmed up until June"
whilst bemoaning:
"It's a tremendous amount of work and part of that is educating three new councilors"

Yes, there is a dungeon in the basement of Old Wolfville Town Hall. That's where CAO and His Munificence take bad little Councilors to be re-educated following the finest traditions of Mao Tse Tung. Responsible Councilors are fitted with electric dog collars and chained to an endless blackboard --- upon which they are required to forever write:

"I promise to feed the bloated bureaucracy and swear my allegance to His Munificence, my Lord and Master. I will practice the fine art of picking the property-owners pocket and pour all monies into the trough of bloated bureaucracy. I will bow before the CAO, my leader on the path of governmental virtue, trembling on bended knee."

His Magnificence, watches, approvingly, from behind a one-way window.