SANTA SAFE FROM MISSILE ATTACK

by James Keller

Don't worry kids. Missile shield or not, no one's going to shoot down Santa.

"We do a test flight with Santa," Maj. Douglas Martin, chief of Santa tracking operations for Norad, said last week.

"We had one on Dec. 2 to make sure all our instruments are properly calibrated, so the chances of a mistake are extremely low."

North American Aerospace Defence Command will track Santa's yearly trip for the 50th time this Christmas Eve. It uses radar, satellites, fighter jets and high-tech webcams to follow Santa over North America and throughout the world.

Even if these carefully calibrated instruments mistake Santa for a North Korean nuke, it's always people who push the buttons. Maj. Martin said they would surely see Rudolph's glowing red nose.

Then there's Santa's skill behind the sleigh.

"Even if something was fired at Santa - and goodness knows it wouldn't be from Canada or the U.S. - I'm sure that he would be able to out-fly anything," said the Canadian soldier.

Besides, Santa makes trips to more dangerous places like Iraq and Afghanistan.

"He came to visit me when I was in Bosnia for Christmas in '97," Maj. Martin said. "He has no problem going into the hot zones."

Children can check up on Santa as he delivers presents by visiting Norad's Santa Tracker website or by calling the Santa hotline. The website will broadcast live webcam images of Santa every half-hour. The hotline will provide up-to-the-minute information on his whereabouts.

But don't wait up for Santa to arrive.

"We have seen Santa go back and forth between Boston and Halifax to see how many kids are asleep, and he'll start delivering in that city first," said Maj. Martin.

"If I were the kids of Halifax, I'd try to get to bed on time."

The Norad Santa Tracker website is www.noradsanta.org and the hotline is 1-877-HI-NORAD (446-6723).